Maine & NH Wedding Photographer // Choosing Your Dream Wedding Dress, Not Theirs
There’s a unique, almost magical moment when a bride puts on her dream wedding dress and feels entirely herself. As a wedding photographer, I’ve had the privilege of witnessing that transformation countless times—but I’ve also seen the hesitation and regret that can come when the dress wasn’t quite the one she’d envisioned. This year alone, three of my brides found themselves in that exact position: they’d bought dresses influenced by their families' opinions and ultimately realized that those gowns didn’t reflect who they truly were. Each ended up going through a second, solo soul-searching dress journey to finally wear what felt right for them on their big day.
We’ve all heard about the emotional process of wedding dress shopping, but it’s not always the dress itself that brings out the tears. Sometimes, it’s the reactions of loved ones, even the subtlest sighs or raised eyebrows. Mothers and friends often don’t realize how much their words can weigh on a bride’s heart. It can be a passing comment or just a slightly awkward pause after a dress reveal, but it can start a spiral of self-doubt, leading a bride to wonder if she’s chosen “wrong.” In the end, it’s usually out of love—they want their bride to look perfect—but that well-meaning input can lead to an internal struggle between choosing what they think is “right” and what the bride herself feels is authentic.
One of my brides faced months of regret after purchasing a dress that her family adored but she didn’t feel at home in. Right before the wedding, she made a brave decision to buy a new gown—one that she knew, in her gut, was *her* dress. Another bride was so torn that she brought both dresses to the wedding and didn’t decide which one to wear until moments before she was supposed to put it on. I was there as she weighed the options, anxious about disappointing her family but longing to feel like herself. She even asked for my perspective because, in that moment, it felt overwhelming. After some heartfelt conversations, she chose her dream dress and looked radiant—an absolute reflection of her true self.
Things to remember:
1. Wedding dresses are highly personal, and only *you* can feel when it’s right. Trust your instincts and let your heart be your guide. If you feel joy and confidence in a dress, that’s the one. Your family and friends will love it too, simply because it brings out your authentic beauty.
2. It’s okay to set boundaries, especially with well-meaning loved ones. Let them know how much their support matters, but gently remind them that your dress choice is about what feels right for you.
3. Even if you’ve already purchased a dress, it’s not too late to find the one that truly speaks to you. Some of the most incredible bridal moments I’ve photographed have come when brides stepped out in the gown they really, truly loved, even if it was a last-minute change.
At the end of the day, your wedding is about celebrating the love and joy you share with your partner. Your dress should reflect who you are, not just the expectations of those around you. If you’re true to yourself, the right people will see that, and your confidence will shine through, creating memories that are every bit as genuine and radiant as you are.
